I heard that once you were bored and so you decided to go on a magical quest and then you came across a talking leopard or some shit and he bestowed this curse something upon you that made you tall but made you unable to ingest diary products and in hindsight that kind of seems like a fair trade even though it sucks for everyone you know because you're taller than them and they think that is balls because most of their friends are taller than them and even though they keep getting told that they're average height they once got called short by someone in high school and it's stuck with them to this day and then they're all 'Fucking Tim is <i>still</i> taller than I am' and they don't get bitter at you because it's hard to get annoyed at you but then they get frustrated at themselves because they're so fucking short and they're sure everyone makes jokes about them behind their short back and if they were ever cast in a movie they would play the part of the comic relief and he would have some impossible falsetto voice and he would probably trip over all the time and he would never have a serious acting career.

Anyway, I had this yoghurt before and I'm not feeling particurlarly great and now I'm pissed at dairy products, so the question is, is there ever a downside to being you? Except the not owning a dog thing, that would blow.